Flowers

Just yesterday, I was discussing gardening and flowers with a new friend.

I reminisced about my grandparents’ ability to grow anything and my unfortunate black thumb.

Then, a friend sent me this song today, titled “Flowers,” and many of the lyrics were…uh, a little too close to home?

The rain won’t stop pouring out my windowpane
And I haven’t left my bedroom in 76 days
I wish something would change
‘Cause I’m losing faith

Samantha Ebert, Flowers

At one point in my life I rarely left my room.

It’s quite possible I am also in this 76-day club.

Over the course of a year, while recovering from some health, family and work issues, I went out maybe eight times. I had cut myself off from everyone, sometimes even my own daughters.

I thought the Lord may have reached His limit on fixing me, that the evil people would win this round, and maybe being alone was just going to be my lot in life.

From the fall of 2022 until the spring of 2024, I waited on the Lord.

So I brought it up in a desperate prayer
Lord, why are you keeping me here?
Then He said to me, “Child, I’m planting seeds
I’m a good God and I have a good plan
So trust that I’m holding a watering can
And someday you’ll see that flowers grow in the valley”

Samantha Ebert, Flowers

I still don’t understand how it all happened, but in the spring of 2024 I started getting up.

Nothing had really changed with my circumstances, but something abruptly shifted inside of me.

By July, I had made drastic life decisions and in September I was living in a different state, renting a room from strangers, and attempting to start a new life. All stirred by a prompting that I didn’t fully comprehend.

So whatever the reason, I’m barely getting by
I’ll trust it’s a season knowing that you’re by my side
Every step of the way
And I’ll be okay

Samantha Ebert, Flowers

It’s now April 2025 and I can barely put into words what the Lord has done since that dreary autumn of 2022.

Except to say that I am in a full blown field of wildflowers…

When I’m on the mountain and looking down below
I’ll see a valley of flowers that needed time to grow
And I’ll thank you for the rain
The hurt and days of pain

And I’ll bring it up in a grateful prayer
Thank you, Jesus, for keeping me there
You know just what I need, and you’ve planted seeds
‘Cause you’re a good God with a real good plan
And you hold my world in a watering can
So I can have peace ’cause flowers grow in the valley

Samantha Ebert, Flowers